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Friday, November 11, 2011

Ready while you are waiting

Inspired by Parker and Larry. 



“Darling, where are you going?” In spite of the opening word, the intonation was snappy. Doreen had laid out her plans during breakfast. This was to be a day full of efficiency. Mike's own plans were squeezed in meticulously, so he could get what he needed and accompany his wife and sister-in-law on their sight seeing and shopping tour. Doreen, by herself, was a guarantee for a busy day. But when her sister from Italy stayed over for her annual visit, the pace would become deadly.
This morning the sisters had come up with a plan that he just couldn't refuse. As if he needed that new laptop today of all days. Hah!
Behind his wife's back he had slipped his favorite, fat, novel into his rucksack. Now he was standing at the backdoor, the keys of his bicycle dangling between his fingers. “Uhm, I saw that my driver's licence needs to be renewed soon. So I was going to have my photo taken. You wouldn't want me to be without a driver's licence, would you?” Check!
Doreen looked doubtful, doing some mental arithmetic. Then she gave in. “Good. My sister is getting dressed and doing her nails for our outing. So if you hurry, you can be back before she's finished.” Had he heard right? Was she tipping over her king?
The woman sighed dramatically. “I was hoping that you'd go to the groceries, the drugstore and pick up a parcel from the post office.” Now she tilted her head and looked helpless.
“Sorry Doreen.” Too late, she was not turning her resignation into a drawn game. “I don't have time. I'm going on my bike.” He opened the back door and walked out as quick as he could.
– “Your bike? Michael, are you crazy? The car will be ...”
– No honey, not now.” With that he unlocked his bicycle and went off.
The october air was quite chilly, but a hat and an upturned collar could do wonders.

He was going to have his picture taken. At this hour he would probably be the only customer so it wouldn't take too long. On his way back … he would treat himself to a nice cup of strong coffee in the early bird's café 'The Sleepy Rooster'. There he would read his favorite scene. He had read the book in his backpack three times already. Each and every turn, his lovely wife had managed to botch up the reading of the epic scene. Mike was determined to read it undisturbed today.
On his way to the photo shop, Mike kept on mulling over his wife habits. Whenever he came up with a plan, she took action, accomplishing the task in less than no time. Everyone around him admired it and informed him how lucky he was to have such a wife. Because he... he was so indecisive, so phlegmatic She must be a great support ot him.
What about letting plans ripen? What about looking at designs from different angles, in different moods? And why not wait a while to see if something new wells up? How often had he perceived a great idea while waiting. For instance that time in the supermarket. He allowed two customers to take place in the line right in front of him, so he had more time to think out a design. If they'd been carrying only one item, Doreen might have accepted it. She was sharp about correct social behavior. But one customer had been hoarding up as if he was going to camp out in the desert, the other obviously was preparing for a tremendous barbecue with beer to flow. Sotto voce Doreen had given him a piece of her mind. So cutting that his pensive mood was over and he actually regretted his gesture.
Mike turned down his collar with one hand. The biking made his blood flow well. He felt like a soldier. On a mission to practise and defend the Art of Waiting.
Three more blocks and he'd be at the photoshop. On the next block was The Sleepy Rooster. As Mike got near to it he casted an anticipating glance at it's façade. “What?!” He squeezed his handbreaks. There was a 'closed' sign on the door. And a note below. “Due to a lack of customers the rooster will be asleep for ever.” This was a blow. Such a charming place, his hide out, gone. Where could he go now to read, undisturbed by wives and in-laws ? He resumed his journey entertaining unlawful thoughts. When our man reached the photographer's store, he was full of rage inside, ready to start an argument with whoever would thwart him first.
“Goodmorning. What can I do for you, sir?” The owner, a hard working man from India, beamed at him. While Mike formulated his request his eye fell on a banner on the wall behind the counter. 'Ready while you are waiting.' Well well, so this was the place to be. That should have been simple irony, but it became a challenge.
After the picture was taken, Mike stayed seated where he was. The photographer threw him a doubtful glance, raising his eyebrows. Then he shrugged and walked away. He had to develope the photo, print it and dry it with a hairdryer in the shortest period possible. No time to waste, if he was to stay in this line of business. Mike took his book out of his backpack and opened it. What a nice quiet little shop this was. The right place for his quest. With a sigh of content he started to read. The photographer had not yet closed the door to his work area. He heard the sigh saw the thick novel. It made him call out to reassure his customer, “Dear sir, it really won't take long. I'll have your photo's ready in no time.”
“Don't worry, man. I'm in no hurry.” was the reply. Now Mike had to read his line again.
The alarm of the door chimed, announcing a second customer. “I'll be right with you,” the owner called, poking his head through the door opening.
“Why don't you help this man first?” Mike suggested.
Why not, the owner went over to the counter and asked his opening question. Delighted Mike started on his favorite scene. The other customer had only one question. After getting the information he was after he left the store. The owner picked up Mike's photo's again and dryed them with the blower. “Your photos are ready sir.”
“Just put them on the counter. This won't take long.”
Annoyed, but also a little troubled, the photographer walked over to Mike. “Please sir. Don't tell me you plan to finish your book here?”
“Oh no”, Michael smiled, “just my favourite scene. Then I'll be off.” If Mike expected some understanding, he was in for an unpleasant surprise.
“No sir.” The shop owner pulled the book from his customer hand and shut it with a snap. Then he handed it back to our dismayed looking friend. “This is not a waiting room.”
“Aha!” Mike shot up from his seat, pulled the owner to his counter. “Then what, pray tell, does thát say?” He pointed at the banner.
The owner read it out loud.
“Precisely. While you are waiting.
Now the owner felt cornered. “We used to send our customers out to shop. They picked up their photos later. Now it's developed so fast, they can wait in my store.” Mike argued that that was exactly what he had been doing. What was wrong about reading a book while waiting? Secretly the dark man vowed he'd remove the banner as soon as this strange client had left. “Your behavior is simply odd, sir. Nobody likes waiting. And you … you … you are waiting even while your photos are ready.
“I'm glad you agree with me.” Mike took advantage of the verbal confusion and opened his book again. Just then the doorbel chimed once more. In sailed a pram with a wailing baby, pushed by a seemingly stone deaf mother. Four other children age three and up, trailed in after her.
Mike's eyes grew large. In a second the shop had turned from a silent oasis to a colony of bickering gulls. He put his novel in his backpack in an instance and drew out his wallet in exchange. “How much?”
The owner didn't waste a moment and named the price. For the first time in his life he was glad to see mrs. Moreno and her band of fallen angels enter his shop.


Outside Mike searched his pockets for the keys of his bicycle. If he hurried home, he thought, he might read a bit in the shed. Or he could lock himself in the bathroom. Nah, who was he kid... his eyes fell on his tyres. Some mindless joker had stolen the valves and the tyres were flat. Mike finally resigned himself to not reading his beloved scene today. He started out for the nearest busstop, wondering if this day could get any worse. “If there is a God” he thought, “then he is obviously on holiday today. Maybe hiding from His in-laws.” He looked up at the electronic sign. His bus was delayed 20 minutes at least. Mike turned up his collar against the cold. And with a thankful smile he reached for his book.



JoAnne Lakefield
Oct. 2011

Sunday, November 6, 2011

THE MEETING

Read by  Parker Stevenson
link to his work as photographer
Voice: Parker Stevenson
link to bio 


He was everything she had dreamed of. His physical appearance, his character, his quick mind, his style, his everything.  She was sure she didn't deserve him.
Whenever he suggested something she might do differently, it felt like ... no, he did that because he wanted what was best for her. And she'd better pay heed to it, because he was right and she was far from perfect.
Whenever he suggested something she might do differently, it felt like criticism. Like the beginning of the end of their relationship. And she complied to what he said, because she didn't want to lose him. She was addicted to him.

Yes, she was far from perfect. She was good, great, smart, sweet, with a good sense of humor and very caring. But this d..... insecurity of hers. It spoiled things. When they'd just met, she was independent and rebellious.  But now? Whatever he said, she agreed with him. There was no more tension between them, she stopped being his sounding board. As if he was back on his own again.
Now, take that time when she was visiting him in his apartment for the first time.  He showed her around and they reached his favorite room, his gym. Full of devices that helped him, not only to stay in shape, but to keep his mind clear. He went to his gym mostly because workouts helped him sort out his emotions and think more clearly. 
She was not involved in any sports, he knew that. So he impulsively suggested that she might use his gym, a little bit of exercise would be good for her. She stepped back, looking as if she had just opened a two months old lunchbox, with the tuna sandwich still in it.  By and by he found out that she didn't like workouts at all, it just didn't give her a good feeling. She had other methods to stay tuned.


Yet, after she had moved in with him -was it a wise decision?-  he found her in his gym. She did use it regularly, he knew that. She left traces:  towels, the exercise bike suddenly had changed settings, sore muscles ...
And now he caught her in the act. Exercising while griping, an interesting combination. "Why ?" he asked her. "Why do you do this?"
She got up from the rower and looked at him apologetically.  "I don't know. Really I don't. Maybe because you were right, I could use some exercise. And maybe, because, I don't know. It sounds so stupid. " She looked away from him. Started a brainstorm on the subject. "It's like I have to do everything you say or else... else I might risk our relationship? And I'm so nuts about you, I can't have you leave me. Or maybe it's just that compared to you I feel so unworthy and drab. I can't be myself anymore, ever since we started dating."
Someone telling you she's in love with you and it doesn't even feel good. He came over to her, trying to catch her eye. "Honey,..."
"No, don't honey me, please. I mean it. I'm afraid that when you suggest me to jump out of the window at the tenth floor, I'll do that too."  And with that, she ran out of the gym. His gym.



It's three days later now and he's coming home straight from his office. "Get ready" he tells her, "we're going to eat out tonight."
A look of wonder is her answer.
"Nothing fancy. Somewhere small and cosy. Just the two of us."
She returns the ingredients she was cutting for dinner, to the refrigerator. "What should I wear?"
What a question! "Nothing. I mean nothing special."
- "Just a clean shirt, OK?"
- "Yes but hurry. I have to go back to the office first. I have to attend a short meeting."
She casts him a questioning frown as she walks past him, leaving the kitchen. "Couldn't you pick me up after the meeting?"
- "Nope. I made reservations and there's not much time between." He steals a kiss and then lets her go to change.
- "Where are we going to?"
- "An Italian restaurant. That's your favorite, right?" Silence "So you can admire my Italian pronunciation." he continues, while thinking how he'd wish she'd poke fun of it instead.
- "I didn't know my man could speak Italian."
- "That's just one of my secrets. But please hurry, people are waiting."


A good thing she's not the kind of woman who loiters in front of a six-door wardrobe, sighing that she has nothing to wear. In no time they reach the firm's building. It's quiet now, they have the elevator all to themselves. While he pushes the button, she notices that they are not going to the storey where his office is. She says nothing however. Obviously the meeting won't be in his office.
The elevator doors slide open and they get out onto a deserted floor.
"Follow me" he says and they walk to a room at the end of the corridor.  The door is shut, but he has the key. "This is my new office. I moved to this floor today," he explains. Inside he turns on the light. She's starting to feel a little cheated. There's no one here, except them.
"You know what floor we are on, right?"
She looks at him. "Tenth?"
- "Correct." He walks over to a window, opens it with another key. He gestures for her to step out of it. "Well?" he adds to it.  Is he crazy, this is the tenth floor? Her look is more than just puzzled.
"Don't you remember when I caught you in the gym? You said you might jump out of the window on the tenth floor if I asked you to."  Yes, she remembers, the flash in her eyes betrays it. "So what is your answer now? "
- "Dopo di lei.  After you." She says it with a beautiful indignation.
- "Crazy goose, you answered well. Of course you don't just do anything I ask you to." He walks up to her and grabs her by the shoulders and shakes her a bit.  "And don't you dare, I need someone who is critical, to keep me alert." He feels in his pocket for the ring. It's there. "Let's go to the restaurant now."
- "What about your meeting? Was it a hoax?"
- "There was a meeting and you were there. You met your old self. Don't let go of her again."

© november 2011
JoAnne Lakefield


Sunday, October 30, 2011

Quote

When leaving primary school all the children used to get a bible. I've still got mine. But there's a text in it that I still don't understand.



I'll translate (it starts below the ISBN) :

No part of this publication may be reproduced and / or made public by means of printing, photocopying, microfilm or in any way whatsoever without prior written consent of the publisher.

 I don't think any preacher, vicar or pastor is going to ask the publisher's consent for each sermon.Or do they mean The Publisher? He does not give his consent, He gave us the assignment to make it public

Friday, October 28, 2011

Another Hubrecht Anecdote



   I always think of myself as a terribly boring person. Not one to date if you like to laugh. But maybe I'm wrong?
    Writing my previous post about the Hubrecht Laboratory, I remembered a little prank I pulled. A two stepped prank.  It was a behavioristic experiment. Fitting a biologist who opposes behaviorism.

  The histology lab was a cosy, busy lab where hard work and laughter were mixed gracefully.
Histology is about preparing and dyeing tissues, to make them visible under the microscope. [Me a stickler for details??]
   One day I brought along two print outs of a shield, used in 1866 in the Amstel Hotel at Amsterdam.


This room is equipped with Edison's Electrical Light.
Please, do not try to switch it on with a match.
Just turn the black switch next to the door.

The use of Edison's Electrical Light
is not detrimental to your health,
does not cause diseases and
doesn't have an adverse effect your night's rest.

The Board of Direction.


    I put up these papers on both entrances to the histology lab. Two windowless doors. No one knew who did it. I secretly enjoyed all the comments and the consequent apologies of the lab manager  "I have no idea who put these on my doors."  But I guess he liked it, he didn't remove them. 

    It happened just as I expected it:  people used the signs for orientation. It was a long corridor and to enter the histology lab you practically had to count doors. With these signs, it was easier to locate the histology and  juxtaposed labs.
   After a few weeks I moved the sign on the left door to the door on the lab at the right of the histo lab. The signs were still on two consecutive doors...
   Yet now one of the signs was on the door to Pim's lab. A researcher whit his own private lab which no one hardly ever entered. While the histo lab was a real beehive.  Poor Pim, so many people entered his lab that day, They must have looked surprised. I heard so many apologies made to him....


   That's how easily people slip into habitual behavior.