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Saturday, August 6, 2011

Yes or No ?

   I like Improv, in the sense of Applied Imrovisation  for therapy, training, mediation, whatever. It all began when I first heard of an Improv player, who saw the similarities between Son-Rise and Improv. And he decided to use Improv for his son, a little boy with 'classic autism'. In need for moreplayers, he started to 'deploy' other Improv players and this is the root of a wonderful initiative. It started with Artists meet Autism and now Deniz and Christiane Dohler share their experience in dealing with autism through AuJa.  Here's a small tribute to the Dohler's work. That is.. as soon as people start reading this blog.

   Improv teaches you about the impact of saying 'Yes! And...' to things instead of  'No', 'Yes,but ...' or even just 'yes... [without any follow up]'.
   Saying Yes! sets things in motion. You may not end up where you thought you would, but at least you'll end up somewhere. Possibly even at a better spot than you imagined. And you have been experiencing life all that time.
   All the other responses block the flow of your creative river. It means you have to come up with something else, something better. And if you block plans frequently -habitually?-,  you might even stop making up new plans. Then you have 'desire without action', a great greenhouse to cultivate depressions!

   I have been thinking of the times I did not say Yes!  Crucial choices, I mean. I'not going to sum all of them up, only a few. Just to see if I can start you off, remembering some choices you've made.

   I've been asked to do my masters with Dr. Ubbels. A rocket launch from NASA Florida was going to be part of it. Wow!  everybody yelled. I was excited too. Played with the thought like rolling a pearl admiringly  in the palm of my hand, around and around.  But I said no. I stuck to the advise of one of my teachers: don't take it, if you don't want to be doing research on that subject for the rest of your career. That's a No I never regretted.   [Item: the launch was canceled later on]
   I've said  'yes but' a zillion times. There's one I'll always regret.  When I worked for my first official employer I met a colleague who traveled with the same bus as I did. He never spoke to me, but always greeted. I'm used to those types, my brother and son are the same.  Not talkative, but you know they're there for you when you need them. And I  was right. Once I had a problem with muscle cramps in my leg and no one noticed except for him. He offered to bring me home on his bike when we got out of the bus.  But I had already arranged for someone to pick me up, so I declined (cursed mobile phone).  After that  I asked myself if I wanted to get to know this colleague better. I answered myself:  "Yes, but let's do it after the summer holidays."  After those holidays, reading the staff magazine, I saw his photo .... among the obituaries. (he was only 47).  The obituary mentioned only his father and children, so he probably lived under circumstances that were comparable to mine.  Not having said Yes! on this occasion,  is what I still regret.
   There's a 'No' that I had forgotten about, until a little while ago. Looking back at it, I now blame my tactile defensiveness for it. I was asked  -yes I'm still painstakingly precise about being truthful-  by a professional cabaret artist, "H." to do audition for his company. H. even had his own theater.  I really loved the idea. I've been in amateur plays and had created "grandpa Craig"  for some 'non-public' evenings (for which H's  theater was hired). Because I was interested in auditioning, I was invited to watch a show. In which a young woman and H's partner  -a rather well developed person, shall I put it that way?-  did a song "Let's just cuddle" while lying in each others arms and petting each other profusely. The hairs in my neck stood up and all my nerves protested. Never, never, never! am I going to do a thing like that I thought and declined the invitation for the audition.  I did participate in some plays after that, but I always made sure the role didn't involve touching other people. 
  I wonder whether participating in H's company might have helped me become less defensive?
Hello JoAnne, you're still alive, you can still go out there and try to find out for yourself. Experiencing over thinking it out, right?  Well no yes, but you know I shouldn't or maybe some other time because I'm really busy with more important matters right now and who knows what else might come around got to be ready for that right I'll wait for another invitation and then I'll be all dressed up for opportunity knocking on my door never heard of knocking on opportunity's door...
   What are you going to say to your next opportunity ?

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